Quote of the day by Stephen Levine: ‘The more control we exert, the harder our bellies become, the tighter our hearts…’ American author's powerful lesson on letting go

Almost everything in life rarely goes as planned. We can try our best to try to control each move, and control every outcome which only ends up causing us stress, anxiety and disconnected from present. American author Stephen Levine once offered a different perspective at not just life, but even happiness and death. He used to believe that living consciously means one has to pay attention to each moment and being compassionate.

Quote of the day by Stephen Levine

“The more control we exert, the harder our bellies become, the tighter our hearts get, and the less happy we are.” In an interview with Randy Peyser of Awake, Levine pointed out human being's need for control people, and how it can effect emotionally and physically. The crux of the quote is that when we try to plan out life to the very last detail, we will find it harder to relax, or accept uncertainties. Levine's message is not about letting go of responsibilities. On the contrary, it encourages once to recognise that life is all about uncertainties and one cannot chalk out their life as per their wishes always.

What does Stephen Levine's quote mean?

The quote asks us to notice what happens when we try too hard to control life. We become stressed, become disappointed or worry constantly. But if you accept uncertainty, it would help people to live with more awareness and compassion. Instead of predicting the next moment, we can choose to be in the now and how we respond in the present situation.


In the same interview, Levine said, in the end, it’s how we live in the present that matters. “If people are more aware of how they feel and what they do, they can respond to the uncertainties of life with compassion,” he says. He also questioned the notion that happiness comes only when life is perfect or when it is attached to outcomes. So when circumstances change happiness disappears too.

Instead, he believes joy can be experienced when you allow yourself to express naturally. Do not wait for life or outcomes to be perfect.

About Stephen Levine

Stephen Levine was an American poet, a meditation teacher and writer known for his work on healing, grief, consciousness and death. His bestselling books in the United States and Europe, including Healing into Life and Death and A Gradual Awakening, were considered groundbreaking in their field.