Lisa Ray says the Bollywood she saw was not that 'glossy and sophisticated'.
One of India’s first supermodels, an accidental actor, cancer survivor, mother of twins through surrogacy, a global citizen. These are various labels that could be attached to the personality of Lisa Ray. Yet, as her recently-released memoir, 'Close to the Bone' reveals, the 47-year-old who stumbled into the Indian entertainment industry at sixteen (and almost starred in a Bond film!) doesn’t approve of labels at all.
From talking about her body-image issues to her complex relationship with food, bulimia, and pursuing love, on her own terms, she can be funny, charming, and searingly honest all at once. Lopamudra Ghatak of ET Online caught up with her to know what gave her hope and courage to carry on.
Lopamudra Ghatak: Half-Bengali, half-Polish, born and raised in Canada, spent summer vacations in Calcutta, studied theatre in England, and worked in Hollywood and Bollywood projects. What comprises the worldview of Lisa Ray? Would you call yourself a global citizen? Lisa Ray: I have passed through many versions of myself over the years, in different latitudes. Today, I am at that stage where I just call myself “me” - the sum of all experiences and circumstances. Earlier, I would have tried to find a label for myself. My life, too, has also been a process of moving through many different labels. Being a mixed blood individual - facing identity issues was a very big driving force and influence - I have had to grapple with where I really belonged, a classic case of the “mixed-blood child” or the “culture kid”.
Before “global citizen” became a popular label, I was already one, thanks to my kaleidoscopic genes. And I think that it’s less of being a global citizen and more a function of the fact that everything is a mosaic in my life, and my nomadic spirit and restlessness have all contributed to my world view.
LG: And Calcutta - before it became Kolkata - has played a certain role in shaping your worldview. Did the Bengali gene overpower the Polish strain? LR: (Smiling) I believe it certainly did, much to the horror of my Polish grandmother who has been a strong presence in my life. I think I was just naturally aligned. The Bengali influence has been very endearing in my life and the time spent in Calcutta in my teens during summer vacations left an imprint. It opened up my imagination and made me see life very differently.
The chaos and confusion in the city coloured my worldview, and my subsequent life choices. Coming from a Western society, where on the surface everything is clean, efficient and rational, the uninhibited existence and madness kind of drew me to it.
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LG: In your memoir, 'Close To the Bone', you describe your stint in Bollywood as that of an outsider who came, saw and managed to keep her calm without being consumed by it. LR: I joined tinsel town when the city was still called Bombay. It was the early ’90s and the economy was undergoing change. The Bollywood I saw was not that glossy, sophisticated and technologically advanced. It hadn’t been corporatised yet; professionalism was still a tough ask (the male lead not showing up on set in time, dialogue being scribbled on paper).
I was always an outsider and enjoyed that status, watching, observing, maybe also because it was not something that I had aspired to do. I was shocked that I had even landed in such an industry, and that’s why I felt that I had to tell my story because it sounds highly improbable today when a lot of people are aspiring to be a part of the industry. And while my equation with Bollywood has been a complex one - my relationship with the industry, the Lisa Ray persona - I was always aware that this was not for me. I was comfortable but never enough to stay put.
In her recently-released memoir, 'Close to the Bone', Ray reveals that she doesn’t approve of labels at all. LG: Talking about complex relationships, you’ve had a love-hate equation with food. You’ve also fought bulimia and body-image issues in your formative years. Did you feel intimidated to share such details in “Close to the Bone”? Were you apprehensive about your image being impacted?
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LR: To be honest, no. I find it easier to be truthful than keep secrets, and that’s who I am today, it was not always like this. I find that there is a great relief and strength in sharing, and often, as if by magic, you tend to connect with people in a much more authentic way. We all have our wounds, scars and issues. Nobody is perfect, and yet we are expected to project this very unnatural kind of image, of being unflawed, and that flaws are bad. I want to question that school of thinking, and perhaps start a dialogue about that.
My relationship with food has been complex because I also love it. Many of my earliest memories are tied up with food, and food is also an expression of love, cultural identity. Anorexia or bulimia is like a mental disease and has nothing to do with a person’s external image. Having worked closely in the fashion and entertainment space, I know that it’s prevalent and I would probably recognise the signs when I see.
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When I was battling bulimia, I had also managed to create a kind of ‘touch-me-not-wall’ around myself that stopped any of my friends from having a conversation with me. At the same time, I was very, very secretive and ashamed as well. But am glad that there is more awareness today and people are willing to talk about it.
Ray says she has passed through many versions of herself over the years, in different latitudes. LG: You’ve also been frank about love, your relationships and the boundaries that you’ve breached. And love, too, hasn’t been easy…
LR: Who I am today is radically different but I am also the culmination of all my past experiences. I don’t think I’d have ever cared to do things differently because my solitary goal has been to experience the full breadth of life. How can you understand what love is unless you go through many sorts of misadventures and missteps and throw yourself into what you feel is love, at the moment. And maybe it was love but it’s the sort of love that burns out, a self-absorbed love.
The search for love is a big thing in everyone’s life, and finally I have realised that instead of chasing love, I had to find love within myself. Only then would I be able to contribute love to someone else in order to create a loving relationship.
LG: At 37, you were diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma in 2009. After being cancer-free for two years, you had a relapse in 2012 around the time of your marriage. What gave you the hope and courage to carry on?
LR: I don’t know ... (pauses) to be honest. All I can posit is that I’ve always been a questioning soul, and while I have not always perhaps found definitive answers but I’ve questioned nevertheless. My questioning has led me in many different directions and a part of it has been self-development and spiritual development, that led me to meet very interesting people who went on to become guides and teachers.
Perhaps, all of this kind of created a bank of hope and courage inside me that I was able to draw on when I was diagnosed and faced a relapse. That is the actual purpose of spiritual development: being able to draw on strength when you are in a pickle, and I was able to get my strength and inner resilience that led me to help myself heal better.
LG: Who is the quintessential Lisa Ray?
LR: (Smiles, eyes twinkle) Hmmm. (pauses) I think that would be curious, nomadic (also traveller) and loving.
*Lisa Ray's memoir 'Close to the Bone' is published by HarperCollins India.
Celebs Who've Fought Serious Illnesses And Inspired Us To Stay Strong
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If you felt like tearing up after having seen Sonali Bendre's Instagram post on Tuesday where she quotes Chilean author Isabel Allende on staying strong, and chops off her tresses, you are not alone.
Many, including her compatriots from the industry and well-wishers, have been feeling emotional and wished her a speedy recovery. But the 44-year-old actress is not the only one who has managed to stay strong in the face of adversity.
Over the past decade, a few others have shown amazing courage and grace while battling medical conditions in real life, and proving to be a source of source of inspiration for their fans.
From Salman Khan to Yuvraj Singh, and Irrfan Khan, we stay inspired by some extraordinary stories of hope and strength.
If you felt like tearing up after having seen Sonali Bendre's Instagram post on Tuesday where she quotes Chilean author Isabel Allende on staying strong, and chops off her tresses, you are not alon..
Earlier this month, Bollywood actress Sonali Bendre revealed that she was undergoing treatment for metastatic cancer, also known as high-grade cancer, in New York. The 43-year-old has shown tremend..
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Earlier in March this year, actor Irrfan Khan revealed on social media in a series of posts that he had been diagnosed with NeuroEndocrine Tumour. The 51-year-old actor is presently undergoing treatment for the same in London.
Right after the reports came out, Shah Rukh Khan rushed to the ailing actor's residence to meet him before he left for his treatment in London. The superstar also gave him the keys to his London house so that Irrfan's family could feel at home during the treatment.
Earlier in March this year, actor Irrfan Khan revealed on social media in a series of posts that he had been diagnosed with NeuroEndocrine Tumour. The 51-year-old actor is presently undergoing trea..
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Bollywood actor Salman Khan has also had a second coming of sorts. The 'Dabangg' actor had been diagnosed with the neuropathic disorder, Trigeminal Neuralgia, in 2007. Also called as the 'suicide disease', the pain in the face, jaw and cheek gets intense and severe. The actor underwent a nerve surgery in the US in 2011 and was back shooting for 'Ek Tha Tiger'.
Bollywood actor Salman Khan has also had a second coming of sorts. The 'Dabangg' actor had been diagnosed with the neuropathic disorder, Trigeminal Neuralgia, in 2007. Also called as the 'suicide d..
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Away in Hollywood, it was bad news for Hugh Jackman's fans. In 2016, 'The Wolverine' star went through the fourth procedure for skin cancer on his nose. The actor first came to know about basal-cell carinoma, the mildest form of cancer, in November 2013. The actor has time and again asked his fans on social media to wear sunscreen to safeguard cancer.
Away in Hollywood, it was bad news for Hugh Jackman's fans. In 2016, 'The Wolverine' star went through the fourth procedure for skin cancer on his nose. The actor first came to know about basal-cel..
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Bollywood actress Manisha Koirala was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2012. The actress immediately went to the US for her treatment, and was declared cancer-free for about two years in 2015. Recently, she made a comeback as Nargis Dutt on the big screen in Raju Hirani's blockbuster 'Sanju'.
Bollywood actress Manisha Koirala was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in 2012. The actress immediately went to the US for her treatment, and was declared cancer-free for about two years in 2015. Rece..
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Yuvraj Singh, too, has fought all odds and showed grit, away from the field. The cricketer was diagnosed with mediastinal seminoma, a germ-cell tumour located between his two lungs, after the 2011 ICC World Cup. Initially, the cricketer did not believe the doctors and continued to play, which deteriorated his health further. He underwent chemotherapy in the United States in 2012. He also went through Ayurveda treatment and rehabilitation the same year. The sportsman also released an auto-biographical narrative 'The Test of My Life: From Cricket to Cancer and Back' in 2013.
In 2016, the cricketer married model-actress Hazel Keech. He has also invested in a series of health start-ups following his recovery.
Also see: All picture's from the couple's big, fat wedding
Yuvraj Singh, too, has fought all odds and showed grit, away from the field. The cricketer was diagnosed with mediastinal seminoma, a germ-cell tumour located between his two lungs, after the 2011 ..
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Bollywood megastar Amitabh Bachchan believes he was reborn on August 2, 1982, after his emergency surgery at the Breach Candy Hospital in Mumbai. The Big B had suffered splenic rupture due to an accident on the sets of Manmohan Desai's 'Coolie' in the University of Bangalore. During the surgery, the actor went into a coma due to the nature of the injury. Shortly after the 'Coolie' incident, he was diagnosed with a muscle dysfunctional disorder - Myasthenia Gravis. The condition makes it difficult for patients to perform simple tasks like brushing one's teeth, lifting arms, walking, etc. The 'Deewar' actor was treated with therapy and medicines, and recovered from the condition, but the doctors indicated that it can trigger any time.
Bollywood megastar Amitabh Bachchan believes he was reborn on August 2, 1982, after his emergency surgery at the Breach Candy Hospital in Mumbai. The Big B had suffered splenic rupture due to an ac..
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In 2013, Bollywood actor Hrithik Roshan underwent a successful brain surgery in Mumbai's Hinduja Hospital to remove a two-month-old blood clot. While performing stunts for his film 'Bang Bang', the actor had suffered head injuries. He then took pain-killers to fight the pain, but that didn't work. After the two-hour long operation, the 'Krrish' star was discharged with in three days, and was advised bed rest for a bit.
In 2013, Bollywood actor Hrithik Roshan underwent a successful brain surgery in Mumbai's Hinduja Hospital to remove a two-month-old blood clot. While performing stunts for his film 'Bang Bang', the..
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In 2009, model-turned-actress Lisa Ray was diagnosed with a rare disease - multiple myeloma, a cancer of the white blood cells known as plasma cells, which produces antibodies. In 2010, she announced that she was cancer-free, after a stem cell transplant. Two years on, she got married to Jason Dehni, a banking executive and philanthropist, in the Napa Valley.
In 2009, model-turned-actress Lisa Ray was diagnosed with a rare disease - multiple myeloma, a cancer of the white blood cells known as plasma cells, which produces antibodies. In 2010, she announc..
