Toolkit to Douse Anger

Anger is perhaps the most toxic of emotions we have. We experience it whenever our ego is hurt. Daniel Goleman, a noted science journalist, describes emotional intelligence as the ability to guide thinking and adjust emotions to adapt to the environment. He coined the term ‘amygdala hijack’.

Amygdala is a small part of the brain that is geared to an automatic response to a perceived threat. Goleman shows that when our ego is hurt, and anger is aroused, its intensity overwhelms the rational thinking of the brain, and goes direct to the amygdala. Rational response is hijacked by an emotional response.

The best way to prevent an amygdala hijack is to increase emotional intelligence.


And it is not difficult once you gain control of the mind with regular practice of four simple steps. First, observe the six-second rule. This is to consciously train the brain to a six-second interval between the stimulus and response. This interval is sufficient to prevent a hijack of reason. The second is to control breathing — the stimulus excites the mind, triggering rapid breathing to increase inflow of oxygen, necessary for a fight or flight. The third is to expand one’s mind to take in the big picture. Once the stimulus is put into a larger context, its intensity will reduce significantly.

Lastly, whenever faced with an intense stimulus, consciously delay response so as to analyse the situation and decide upon an appropriate response.