Why Jayasuriya wants Dr D's advice to get rid of some headlines

The former Sri Lanka skipper has been banned for two years from “any cricket related activity” by the ICC.

Why Jayasuriya wants Dr D's advice to get rid of some headlines
He is one of the leading doctors in the country. He values his privacy (but not of his clients.)

Dear Dr D,

I have been banned for two years from “any cricket related activity” by the ICC under Article 2.4.6 (“failure or refusal to cooperate with any investigation”) and Article 2.4.7 (“obstructing or delaying any investigation by concealing, tampering with or destroying documentation”).

I admit it. I did delete emails, web pages and tweets about my past. I come to you as one might to a confessor. Please have a look and see if my actions were justified. Here are the headlines I am trying to get rid of:


“Jayasuriya joins two teams in Bengal League”: Yes, I did sign up with both Kalighat Cricket Club and Mohun Bagan.

But is there a rule which says that the bowler, batsman, fielder and keeper cannot be the same person? In our times of transgender rights, what about trans-player rights? “Jayasuriya accused of smuggling betel nuts”: This was outrageous slander. It was zarda and not betel nuts!

“Jayasuriya sex tape leaked”: Something about me and a former partner. Totally fake news. It was not leaked; it was deliberately presented.
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“Jayasuriya calls Bangladesh third class team”: Okay, my bad. I apologise to Bangladesh and its fans. It’s fourth class and not third.

Am I wrong in doing what I am?

SJ,
Colombo

Dear SJ,


The answer is yes. Please cooperate on Article 2.4.6 and 2.4.7.
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STATUTORY WARNING: This humour column is not for the weak-kneed or the thin-skinned.


Jayasuriya, Mike Tyson, Mohammed Shami: Sports Stars Caught On The Wrong Side Of Law
1/6

By Maleeva Rebello

Former Sri Lankan cricket captain Sanath Jayasuriya was recently accused of smuggling rotten betel nuts to India. While the former cricketer denied the allegation, here are other sports stars who have been caught on the wrong side of the law.

(In pic from left: Sanath Jayasuriya, Mike Tyson, Muhammed Shami)

By Maleeva RebelloFormer Sri Lankan cricket captain Sanath Jayasuriya was recently accused of smuggling rotten betel nuts to India. While the former cricketer denied the allegation, here are other sp..
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In 1994, American figure skater Tonya Harding and her ex-husband Jeff Gillooly were accused of plotting an attack on two-time Olympic medallist Nancy Kerrigan. Kerrigan was clubbed in the knee during practice, leaving her with a broken bone. Although Harding vehemently denied any involvement in the assault, Gillooly was implicated in the crime. Harding eventually pleaded guilty to hindering the prosecution, which earned her a life ban and ended her career as a skater.
Crime: Hindering prosecution against ex-husband, Jeff Gillooly.
Punishment: Banned for life from the US Figure Skating Association
(Image: Tonya Harding/Instagram)

In 1994, American figure skater Tonya Harding and her ex-husband Jeff Gillooly were accused of plotting an attack on two-time Olympic medallist Nancy Kerrigan. Kerrigan was clubbed in the knee during..
Read More

Over the years, Mike Tyson has been accused and convicted of rape, felony, drug possession and crashing into a police vehicle. In 2006, the former heavyweight champion admitted to being addicted to drugs. The following year, he was sentenced to 24 hours in jail and three years’ probation for drug possession and driving under the influence. Prior to that, in 1992, he was sentenced to six years in prison and four years of probation for raping a teenage beauty queen.

Crime: Felony, drug possession and crashing into a police vehicle.
Punishment: Jail for 24 hours, three years probation, 360 hours community service and help with drug issues.

Over the years, Mike Tyson has been accused and convicted of rape, felony, drug possession and crashing into a police vehicle. In 2006, the former heavyweight champion admitted to being addicted to d..
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The South African paralympian was convicted for shooting and killing his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp, on Valentine’s Day 2013 through a locked bathroom door. Pistorius shot Steenkamp, who, he claimed, he mistook for an intruder. In 2014, Pistorius was found guilty of culpable homicide for which he got a fiveyear prison sentence. The sentence was overturned. He was convicted for murder in 2016 but subsequently handed down only six years. Last year, South Africa’s Supreme Court of Appeal doubled his sentence to 15 years.

Crime: Murder.

Punishment: 15 years imprisonment for murder and suspension from athletic competitions till his sentence is served.

The South African paralympian was convicted for shooting and killing his girlfriend, Reeva Steenkamp, on Valentine’s Day 2013 through a locked bathroom door. Pistorius shot Steenkamp, who, he claimed..
Read More

In 2002, German tennis legend Boris Becker faced a lengthy prison term for tax evasion. The three-time Wimbledon champion was said to have knowingly defrauded the German tax authorities by filing false tax returns. Becker was found guilty and was even convicted for the crime. However, the judges rejected the prosecution’s demand to put him behind bars. Becker had pleaded guilty to evading about 1.7 million euros tax by claiming to live in Monte Carlo at a time when his main residence was really in Munich.

Crime: Evading taxes since the 1990s.

Punishment: Two-year prison sentence that was suspended for three years, 500,000 euro fine and payment of the entire cost of the trial.

(Image: Boris Becker/Instagram)

In 2002, German tennis legend Boris Becker faced a lengthy prison term for tax evasion. The three-time Wimbledon champion was said to have knowingly defrauded the German tax authorities by filing fal..
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Earlier this year, the Indian cricketer was accused of domestic violence and adultery by his wife, Hasin Jahan. Mohammad Shami was charged for attempted murder, rape, cheque bouncing and match-fixing. The BCCI’s Anti-Corruption Unit cleared the bowler of the match fixing claims, but the other accusations are still being investigated, with the next hearing of the case scheduled for January 2019.

Crime: Accused of domestic violence, attempted murder and rape.

Punishment: Ongoing case.

Earlier this year, the Indian cricketer was accused of domestic violence and adultery by his wife, Hasin Jahan. Mohammad Shami was charged for attempted murder, rape, cheque bouncing and match-fixing..
Read More

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