You might never get your dream job: Psychology says your brain could be the biggest obstacle, here's how to overcome it

Many people spend years chasing their dream job but never quite get there. While reasons such as competition, lack of opportunities or economic conditions are often blamed, neuroscientist Emily McDonald believes there may be another factor at play. According to her, the brain itself can quietly stop people from taking the steps needed to achieve their goals. Her explanation, shared during an appearance on the Jay Shetty Podcast, has sparked discussions about how our identity and mindset influence career choices.

Your brain's 'default mode' may be keeping you stuck

According to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders, the brain is the most complex organ in the human body. It contains around 86 billion neurons with thousands of connections that manage everything from memory and movement to emotions and decision-making.

McDonald says one part of the brain, known as the Default Mode Network (DMN), plays a major role in how people see themselves and behave every day.


"So the default mode network is really appropriately named because it kind of helps to regulate and propel our default mode of behavior," she said on the Jay Shetty Podcast.

She further explained, "It's responsible for our default mode of being and doing. But it's also responsible for our sense of self and constructing the narrative or the story of our lives."

According to McDonald, this becomes a problem when a person's self-image does not match the future they want.

"And so if your sense of self doesn't match, if your identity doesn't match whatever it is that you're trying to do, then your default mode network is not really going to be helping you do the behaviors or take the action toward doing starting a podcast," she said.

Why changing your identity matters

McDonald believes many people focus only on goals while ignoring the identity behind those goals. One of the techniques she recommends is what she calls "identity shifting."

"Just like shift your identity," she said.

"You can just start to identify as the version of you who has done the thing."

"You have to act like you already have it or like you already are it in order to do it or be it."

The idea is not about pretending but about gradually changing how you think about yourself so your actions begin to match the person you want to become.

Fear of success can also lead to procrastination

McDonald says fear is another major reason people stay where they are.

"So the second reason why most people procrastinate is fear. A lot of times we are actually subconsciously afraid of success and I think this is a big reason why a lot of people stay stuck, is that we are actually subconsciously afraid of what it might look like if we succeed at doing it."

She also encouraged people to take what she described as "delusional level risks and leaps of faith."

"It's really a requirement to achieving or receiving or having whatever it is that we want," she noted.

The numbers show dream jobs remain out of reach

Career data appears to support the idea that many people are not working where they hoped they would. A JobSage survey found that only around 7% to 10% of Americans say they currently have their dream job. The same study found that just 47% of respondents believed their dream career was realistic in today's economy. Data from StandOut CV also shows that retail, sales and food service remain among the most common occupations in the US.

Can your brain really change?

While McDonald's advice focuses on mindset, experts say the brain is capable of adapting throughout life. According to the Cleveland Clinic, this ability is known as neuroplasticity, which refers to the brain's capacity to learn, reorganise and create new neural connections through experience.

Psychologist Dr Grace Tworek explains that neuroplasticity allows people to keep learning new skills, adapt to changing situations and even rebuild pathways after injuries such as strokes or traumatic brain injuries. As people learn something new or repeatedly practise a behaviour, the brain forms new synaptic connections that strengthen those habits over time.

McDonald, who holds degrees in neuroscience from the University of Texas at Austin and the University of Arizona, has built a large audience by translating brain science into practical advice through her social media platforms, podcast and coaching programmes. While career success depends on many factors beyond mindset, her message is that changing the way you see yourself may be the first step before changing your career.