Do you avoid looking in the mirror? Here's why watching your reflection can feel uncomfortable

Someone in your office said you have acne in your face and suggested a remedy for it. One day your friend said your hair is frizzy and you should use this shampoo. Someone again recommended that you buy jeans from this brand. These could be very casual conversations and people told you because they care about it. But you somewhat felt something was wrong with you.

After a point in time, when you look in the mirror, you don’t notice the beauty but just the scar you have. Your attention then goes to your hair and you don’t like it. Soon, getting ready feels less like a routine and more like an inspection. After some time, looking in the mirror becomes uncomfortable.

Some people start disliking their reflection. This can be because they do not want to feel bad about themselves or feel they are inferior to others.

Why can looking in the mirror make you feel disappointed?

When you look into the mirror you don’t just stare at yourself. You are looking at your reflection to analyse your appearance. It means how you appear to others. You have a picture of yourself in your mind and when you see your reflection, if it looks different, sometimes you feel disappointed, sometimes you feel it can be improved, but then you may feel you are not up to the mark. So there is a gap between what you appear and what you think.

Self-discrepancy theory can be one of the ways to explain the above behavior. The theory was described by Psychologist E. Tory Higgins in 1987. It gives a simple explanation that there is a difference between how people look at themselves and how they actually want to be.

Imagine someone who believes they should always look fresh. They notice tired eyes after a difficult night. Their reflection now feels disappointing. While Higgins theory can be applied to the above example, it is not true for everyone who avoids mirrors.

Can staring at a disliked feature make you feel worse?

Do you feel that on some occasions you just keep focusing on your flaws? You keep staring at the burn mark in your hand or the stretch marks you have after losing weight. You feel conscious about it, and that stays in your mind.

An experiment was conducted in 2019 which concluded that it matters to people how they look.

In this experiment, Researchers Ellise M. Barnier and James Collison randomly assigned 51 participants without a clinical diagnosis to two mirror conditions.

One group looked into a mirror from about a metre away. The other focused on a disliked feature from roughly 10 centimetres away.

After five minutes, participants who were closer to the mirror concluded that they were less satisfied with their looks. They became more stressed about their looks which increased their body shame. People who have watching from a distance did not have that intense effect.

When you focus your attention to yourself and do a close inspection, you tend to concentrate on something you don’t like.

The experiment suggests that such scrutiny can worsen feelings. However, distance and instructions changed together. The study cannot tell us which element caused each effect. Nor does ir show that just looking at mirror could harm anyone.

Why might someone judge their reflection through other people’s eyes?

Sometimes the question becomes, “How will other people judge me?”

The issue at hand can be explained by the objectification theory propose by Psychologists Barbara Fredrickson and Tomi-Ann Roberts in 1997. They described how women may learn to view their bodies from an observer’s perspective in cultures that sexually objectify them.

Such a perspective can encourage habitual monitoring of appearance. The theory links that monitoring with greater opportunities for shame and anxiety.

Picture someone getting ready for a gathering. They repeatedly examine how their body might look to others. Their attention shifts away from whether their clothes feel comfortable.

The above example helps us understand where the self-objectification begins. It is not applicable to every person. The original theory focused on women’s experiences and it is applicable to everyone who dislikes mirrors.

Does avoiding mirrors mean someone has body dysmorphic disorder?

No. Avoiding mirrors does not mean you have any body disorder, which it can be one of the reasone but is does not establish a diagnosis.

Body dysmorphic disorder, or BDD can be understood as the condition where people worry about what they think is a flaw for others and for them.Those flaws are often unnoticeable to other people.

The most important thing about people with BDD is that some people constantly check mirrors and then another lot avoid them completely. Both these things can seriously affect everyday life.

Therefore if you avoid mirrors occasionally, you may be different from those who wo are constantly worried about their appearance and it ends up disrupting work and relationships.

Someone who occasionally looks away is therefore different from someone whose appearance worries repeatedly disrupt work or relationships.

When should mirror discomfort receive more attention?

The next time when you feel uncomfortable when you looking at a mirror, you need to notice what are you feeling around that moment when you wish to look away?

Was it a momentary feeling? Or is it something you think is going to decide your entire day.

And if you are facing the second situation then you are under continuous stress and an appointment with a mental health professional may be a good thing for you. You do not need to diagnose yourself, just see an expert and tell them about your experience and you may get better clarity,