Politeness, smartest tool in the toolkit

Politeness is seen as a weakness in certain societies and cultures that valorise aggression. But it is a valuable tool even in realpolitik. Last week, when someone posted the photo of a note taped to a car window with the message, 'Hi, PLEASE DO NOT PARK YOUR CAR HERE!' from a Bengaluru resident to his or her neighbour who had parked in the wrong spot, there was much mirth among the social media yapperati.

Many pointed out that this kind of message would have been unthinkable and pointless in cities north of the Vindhyas where 'mardangi' would dictate a response like deflating tyres or a smashed window. We are yet to ascertain whether the note on the car window worked or not, but 'research' shows that being polite has more chance of ending in a successful resolution than entering a viceful cycle.

Diplomacy is politeness in its geopolitical form. On paper, belligerence may appear to deliver the goodies. But which victorious side in a war will admit that politeness could be a far inexpensive, less damaging strategy than the dramabaazi of war? Being polite is, of course, contextual. But Mohandas Gandhi showed most famously what it can achieve through his 'polite' non-cooperation. In the run-up to elections, politicians could try and be more polite to their opponents. Who knows, it may be seen as a sign of quiet confidence by voters.