PNG, a Nifty way to say, 'it's you, not me'

Whenever in doubt about people not taking you seriously, throw in some Latin. You know, suo motu (that sounds like a sumo wrestler), de facto/de jure (two Brazilian football defenders), prima facie (attention-hogging ballerina), and, of course, persona non grata (a mysterious menu in between a buffet and a la carte), a.k.a. PNG. In the grand theatre of diplomacy, it's the equivalent of a state-sponsored social media 'unfollow'.

PNG is the perfect balance of passive-aggressive efficiency. No messy wars, no tedious negotiations that end in an 'understanding' (not an agreement). Just a simple stamp of disapproval that sends someone packing with their dignity stuffed into a diplomatic pouch. The beauty lies in its ambiguity. Did you insult the host nation? Were you spying on us? Sorry, just 'begone!' And no PNG declaration is a one-handed clap. A tat always follows a tit. For all its saas-bahu-flavoured drama, PNG remains the ultimate tool of plausible deniability. It's the ultimate reversal of that old lovers' tiff line, with PNG essentially being: 'It's not me, it's you' as an explanation for a break-up. In a world that demands - nay, craves - spectacle, pomp and melodrama, declaring someone 'persona non grata' is the most refined way to say: 'We simply cannot, and will not, deal with your nonsense any longer. You are a nonsense person.'