Not-So-Great Britain's curse of the colonies

Call it the Curse of the Colonies. Not-So-Great Britain's output has fallen, almost as fast as Shiraj's forces fell in Palashi, to 0.3% in October on a month-on-month basis. Revised figures on Friday showed GDP dropping 0.1% in Q3 from Q2. Thankfully, QE2 isn't around to see this shrinkage of her queendom. This is a downgrade from the zero growth initially estimated - rather like Delhi hoping its AQI remains 'very poor', only to find it turn 'severe'. Meanwhile, Jeeves has called it... recession.

One option is to sell the family silver. Unfortunately, much of it isn't legit property. Return the knick-knacks the colonial Brits nicked from their ex-empire (why do they still have an MBE when there is no BE?) to fill the British Museum and we have a very large empty building with central air-conditioning machines probably made in South Korea. The curse of colonialism - like Tutankhamun's Curse that plagued Howard Carter and Lord Carnarvon who dug the pharaoh's tomb out of British protectorate Egypt - may now be only lifted with 1,008 brahmins conducting a havan. The rishi in Downing Street can be bunged in, since brahxit led to a shortage of skilled brahmanical labour. If not in the museum, the knocking of havan's door purgation process can take place in their biggest real estate, that Buckingham Bhavan place.