Heard and McDonald, new go-to place

Never mind what the penguins of Madagascar - the movie, not the island in the southeastern coast of Africa - have to say. The new hot destination is the cold Heard and McDonald Islands. Tipped off from obscurity by an American orange-haired travel agent, this H&M is the kind of place that HNIs who rush after the latest 'thang' should rush towards. Located 4,000 km southwest of Australia and entirely uninhabited by humans (illegal immigrants included), this icy Eden on the way to Antarctica offers peak exclusivity, bragging rights and no wi-fi. Yes, it takes a 2-week voyage through freezing seas. And, yes, you'll be outnumbered by (aforementioned) penguins. But true blue new destinations are worth the effort, no?

So, what's on offer at the H&M? Marvel at Big Ben, the active volcano that erupts just enough to keep your insurance agent awake at night. Watch elephant seals lounge like retired hedge fund managers. Spot rare, judgemental seabirds who'll think you're a dodo. As for food - foraged glacier moss, plankton ceviche and fresh-caught whatever survived the cold. Naturally, it's all locally sourced, just the way Michelin-starred joints have it. Drinks? Start with glacier-chilled krill-infused negronis, or the signature Sub-Antarctic Spritz, made with meltwater. Go for it. Before it's overrun by over-tariffed wildlife.