The robot that took a human's job

A robot goes for a job interview. The manager asks, 'What makes you qualified?'

Robot: I have 10 terabytes of experience, zero sick days, and I don't steal office pens.

Manager [impressed]: Any weaknesses?


Robot [sighs]: Occasionally, I   update during meetings and scream 'Installing Windows... please wait'.

It gets the job anyway - because that's still better than Ravi from accounting, who shouts, 'Windows installing... please wait' without the robot's plus points.

For a Pint of Robo

A robot opens a bar. A man walks in and asks for a beer.

The robot says, 'Tell me your IQ first.'

Man: 150.

The robot serves him a craft IPA and discusses quantum physics.

Another man walks in: 'IQ 90.'

The robot serves him Kingfisher Ultra and talks about cricket.

Finally, a third man walks in: 'IQ 30.'

The robot leans over and whispers, 'So... are we voting for the same guy in the next election?'