Salary Sleep
The text uses satire to highlight absurd scenarios across corporate life, economics, and sports. It describes a company where employees are made to “work” in their sleep, even monetising dreams, before collapsing when reality and logic break down.
By ET Bureau |
A CEO announced a new productivity hack: employees would work while asleep. Beds were installed in offices, and dreams were monetised as IP.
One worker dreamt of quitting, and HR immediately fired him for insubordination. The company collapsed when shareholders realised they were also asleep, and dividends were imaginary.
Economic Absurdity
An economist was asked to predict the future. He said, 'In the short run, we're all broke. In the long run, we're all consultants.' He then published a report proving that recessions are caused by people refusing to buy things they don't need.
Governments applauded and immediately subsidised inflatable bananas. The stock market soared, then collapsed when investors realised bananas don't have IPOs. (But AI bananas? )
'What is Football?'
A football team hired a philosopher as coach. His strategy was simple: 'The ball is round, therefore life is meaningless.' Players stopped scoring, preferring to meditate at midfield.
Fans complained, but ticket sales rose because people enjoyed the silence and came to stadiums instead of non-existing libraries or cinemas where every 5 mins a mobile phone rang. Meanwhile, the team won the championship when opponents forfeited, claiming existential dread, which they had learnt about from this philosophical side.
One worker dreamt of quitting, and HR immediately fired him for insubordination. The company collapsed when shareholders realised they were also asleep, and dividends were imaginary.
Economic Absurdity
An economist was asked to predict the future. He said, 'In the short run, we're all broke. In the long run, we're all consultants.' He then published a report proving that recessions are caused by people refusing to buy things they don't need.
Governments applauded and immediately subsidised inflatable bananas. The stock market soared, then collapsed when investors realised bananas don't have IPOs. (But AI bananas? )
'What is Football?'
ADVERTISEMENT
A football team hired a philosopher as coach. His strategy was simple: 'The ball is round, therefore life is meaningless.' Players stopped scoring, preferring to meditate at midfield.
Fans complained, but ticket sales rose because people enjoyed the silence and came to stadiums instead of non-existing libraries or cinemas where every 5 mins a mobile phone rang. Meanwhile, the team won the championship when opponents forfeited, claiming existential dread, which they had learnt about from this philosophical side.
Download
The Economic Times Business News App for the Latest News in Business, Sensex, Stock Market Updates & More.
The Economic Times Business News App for the Latest News in Business, Sensex, Stock Market Updates & More.
ADVERTISEMENT
