A kundli economy

Astrologers announce that Budget 2026 will be aligned with planetary movements. Income-tax relief depends on whether Mercury is retrograde. Subsidies for farmers hinge on Saturn's mood.

One MP asks, 'What if Jupiter sneezes?' The astrologer replies, 'Then the Sensex will catch a cold.' Everybody ignores the economists kept on standby.

Gross Domestic Stuff

A father sits down to explain the Union budget to his kids. 'This year, we're increasing capital expenditure.' The kids reply, 'Does that mean more pocket money?' He says, 'No, it means I'll buy a new fridge.'

His wife interrupts: 'And what about fiscal deficit?' He sighs: 'That's when I promise to buy the fridge but end up repairing the old one with duct tape.'


May the 1st Be With You

Budget 2026 is released on February 1 as a Sunday special science fiction saga in 10 back-to- back episodes. These include - Episode 1: The Taxpayer Strikes Back. Episode 5: Attack of the Fiscal Deficit. Episode 9: Revenge of the Subsidies.

Cliffhanger ending? A suspenseful pause before revealing whether petrol prices go up or down after all that drama with Trump and Russian oil. Spoiler: they go sideways.