I try to play with a smile: Tickner finds perspective beyond cricket after wife's cancer battle

Wellington: New Zealand fast bowler Blair Tickner says witnessing his wife's battle with cancer two years ago changed his perspective on life and he now focusses on enjoying his cricket instead of being bogged down by the pressure of performance that he felt early in his career.

Tickner made his New Zealand debut in 2019 in the T20 format before breaking into the ODI and Test sides in 2022 and 2023 respectively.

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Things became difficult for him personally when his wife Sarah went through eight months of cancer treatment after being diagnosed with leukaemia in April 2024.

She was discharged from hospital on christmas eve in that year and has been in remission ever since. Tickner is part of the ODI squad that is playing a home series against India right now. It is just his 19th national appearance in the format.

"My life, yeah, it's been up and down," the 33-year-old pacer said ahead of the second ODI against India.

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"It's amazing to have Sarah and my family through it all. And, I guess, now I'm just trying to enjoy my cricket and I'm probably being a bit more myself.

"I think I've had different parts of my career. I guess, start of my career, I felt a lot of pressure, then when we had Sarah's cancer treatment, it was hard," he reflected.

Tickner said with the perspective that he has gained over the past two years, he has understood the importance of enjoying every moment.

"...now I'm sort of in the back end and I'm looking forward to just having fun, really. And it's what I'm trying to do, showing myself."

The New Zealand pacer, who also has a daughter, said in the last few years he has realised that cricket is important but not the most important part of his life.

"I try to play with a smile on my face, and, yeah, it's a lot more than cricket, obviously. It's done a lot for me, but I know that at the end of the day, I'm going to go home to my daughter and my wife and I'm pretty happy and pretty lucky to do that.

"So, yeah, cricket's a little bit less than that."

India won the rain-hit first ODI by five wickets to take a 1-0 lead in the five-match series.