Two traumatic instances - Bhattacharyas in Norway and Baby Falak in Delhi - highlight the relationship of a state with children

Two traumatic instances - the Bhattacharyas in Norway and Baby Falak in Delhi - highlight the fraught relationship a mai-baap sarkar - a heavy-handed 'mother-father' state - can develop with children in its fold. Norway's Child Protection Services (CPS) separating the Bhattacharya infants for 10 months from their parents on unclear charges of being inadequately looked after reflects the dangers of exaggerated state welfarism - fed by domestic politics that's hostile to migrant labour - overlooking crucial factors like cultural differences while deciding what makes parents ideal.

In fact, few parents begin by being so, usually learning on the job. In situations where concerns about children's welfare emerge, the state should ideally offer help to parents needing an extra tip. The CPS could have provided such assistance to the Bhattacharyas, a young couple working in Norway, far away from a homelier context of extended family support.

But by removing their children, putting them in foster homes without familiar language or habits, and allowing the parents to meet them after three months apart, the CPS literally reflected a mai-baap attitude where state powers assume parenting roles. This is deeply objectionable. Few parents are perfect - just like few states. The state should facilitate parents needing help, not take their children away, arrogantly and arbitrarily.

On the other extreme, there's Baby Falak, abandoned by parents and battered by strangers. Her situation shows a patronising state that's cold, distant and unbothered, doling out occasional sops to citizens but not investing systematically in reducing poverty or diminishing social brutality. Three Indian children have experienced two kinds of mai-baap states. Hopefully, a more balanced approach will develop, where state and families together ensure good childcare - without gross nanny-ism or grotesque neglect.