As Prabha is snuffed out, parents fear for kids abroad

By Divya J Shekar & Umesh R Yadav
BENGALURU: For fashion designer Ravina Belani, sending her daughter to the Rhode Island School of Design was never an easy decision. The Bengalurean needed to convince herself that her 20-yearold cannot be deprived of the education she desired. Post the Sydney attack, Ravina's anxiety has only heightened.

“I have told her not to walk back to the dorm alone at night, always travel with a bunch of friends and take the public transport whenever possible,“ she said, adding that she makes it a point to Whatsapp, call or FaceTime her daughter at least 2-3 times a day.

“My daughter stays in Providence, which has public security. But I fear for her all the time, especially since some of her friends got mugged Downtown,“ she added.

For many families in Bengaluru ­­ where many middle-class homes have at least one member working or studying overseas ­­ Prabha Kumar's funeral on Sunday, was a reminder of their own vulnerability.

While friends and neighbours speculated on whether the fatal attack in Sydney was a racial one, people who came to pay their last respects at the Arun Kumar household on Sunday ­­ where Prabha's body was kept ­­ were seen sharing their anger and fears. Jayalakshmi, a neighbour, said: “I think authorities would have made better efforts if it was an Australian who was killed.“

Prabha's relatives believe it could be a racial attack. Vinayaka P , a Bengalurean techie currently based in the suburbs of Chicago, said that despite a number of attacks and muggings Indians face abroad, his parents believe that working or studying abroad was better than being in India. “There is nothing like a safe place any more.We have to take our own precautions,“ he said.

Quality of life and the prospects for career growth seem to clinch the issue although parents would rather have their children closer home. Latha Ganesh, whose son works in the oil industry in the US, said: “Though I fear for him, he is doing well there. I can only pray for his well-being.“

Sindhu Muralidhar, who sent her 21-year-old daughter to pursue a master's in mass communication to Melbourne weeks before the attack on Prabha, said there is no place in the world that is completely safe, and that restricting children will not help. “It is troubling and disturbing. Though I am worried for her, I can only caution my daughter and ensure that she is not out at odd hours,“ she said. Online video-chats, which parents of techiesstu dents based overseas have mastered, have come in handy . Since the attack on Prabha, parents like Ravina have been connecting on a daily basis with their children and giving them a new list of “dos and don'ts“.

Rajeshwari Kuncham told her 25-year-old son in Syracuse University , not to speak his native tongue in public. She was particularly worried because of a spate of attacks on Teluguspeakers during the last few years. “Though I never expressed it openly , there is always this persistent worry that keeps nagging me,“ she said. Apparently security officials and teachers at her son's university too warned her son not to carry cash and valuables and never to react aggressively if mugged.

Prabha was stabbed on March 7 as she was walking home while speaking on the phone with her husband Arun Kumar.She even described the stranger who was following her and informed her husband that she had been stabbed. Prabha's nine-year-old daughter Meghana, who is in the middle of her school exams, was told of her mother's death only on the day Prabha's body arrived in Bengaluru. Prabha's body was flown in a chartered aircraft to Mangaluru, from where it was taken to her village for the last rites.