When Your Manager Shows Strong Emotions After You Resign, Here’s What It Could Mean

While quitting a job may appear to be simply another professional move for the employee, it can bring about some strong emotions in the manager that extend well beyond normal organizational procedures. An employee may be shocked by how upset their supervisor appears when he or she is told to resign, even if the process is carried out in a very polite and professional manner.

It is important to realize that this is not an isolated incident, but rather it is supported by research on the issue. For example, according to results mentioned in a strategic planning document from Collier County Public Schools, managers usually feel more intense emotions when their employees quit than they do during other organizational activities.

Loss of control plays a major role

Another important factor that contributes to the strength of the managers' reactions lies in the feeling of losing control over the structural aspects and work processes in the organization. In case a member of the team decides to leave, managers perceive that their power over the management process is limited, especially if the process occurs unexpectedly or in a sudden manner.


According to the aforementioned Collier County report, the inability to maintain control over the process causes stress because managers strive to establish control over an unstable process. Therefore, one should assume that the manager's stress relates to the situation itself rather than to the person leaving.

Employee relations do not always stick to the work and duties alone. At times, they become more emotionally driven and end up forging strong ties between management and staff members. As a result of the strong bond developed, an employee's resignation can be perceived personally and not professionally.

Studies have revealed that this kind of situation can make a manager act like a disappointed friend due to the surprise element associated with the action. The Collier County resource reveals that managers might view resignation as a very personal matter, and this influences their actions at that particular time.

It becomes difficult to differentiate between professionalism and personalization in such situations.

Organizational pressure adds to the stress

In addition to personal sentiments, there are also other issues that arise after an employee’s departure, for the manager, including having more tasks to do and being required to replace a departed employee quickly. Such issues may enhance one’s negative reactions since they have to act promptly.

The same report indicates that resignation is viewed by managers as a potential hazard to productivity and team effectiveness, hence their defensive attitudes. In some situations, frustration on the part of the manager can be an indication to other people on the team.

How employees experience these reactions

It should be borne in mind that an emotional reaction from a manager can define an employee's perception of their experience in a company. An emotionally negative reaction may seem unjustified or exaggerated because the reason for the employee's resignation can relate to his personal development and improvement of his working conditions.

According to a study conducted by BMC Psychology, emotionally intensive interactions at the workplace can be among the factors causing emotional exhaustion because people have to control their emotions and other people's emotions.

Emotional exhaustion on both sides

The process of resignation creates stress for both the managers and the employees because they engage emotionally in the process of transitioning. The manager faces uncertainty and stress, while the employee faces challenges in the process of quitting and still being professional.

From the BMC Psychology research, the interaction process in the context of communication might cause emotional exhaustion, especially when there is a communication conflict. It is important to note that employees tend to be very sensitive regarding the way they are being handled at the time of leaving, and any bad reactions shown by managers can lead to perceptions of unfairness in the organization.

If a resignation letter is accompanied by frustration and anger, the employee’s perception will not be favorable towards the organization, and he or she may not speak positively about the organization in the future. According to the Collier County report, fairness perceptions do make a difference in employees' attitudes, regardless of their employment status.

A human moment in a professional setting

In essence, the act of resigning is fundamentally a very human one that involves decision-making processes and the realities of the working world. The manager faces more than just the problem of running an efficient organization; he faces emotional factors such as changes, control issues, and interpersonal relationships.

It is this consideration of the underlying factors of any resignation that makes sense of why certain reactions are so strong at times. Effective communication, in particular, becomes crucial in making sure that the right approach is taken in each situation.