Know the modern dating trend ‘Shrekking’; How lowering your standards in love can lead to heartbreak

A new dating trend called "Shrekking" is gaining attention on social media, but relationship experts are raising alarms about its potential negative impact on romantic relationships.

'Shrekking' involves intentionally dating someone you're not physically attracted to, with the hope that they will treat you better than more conventionally attractive individuals. The term draws inspiration from the animated film Shrek, where Princess Fiona looks beyond Shrek's appearance and finds love. However, in the context of dating, 'Shrekking' often leads to unmet expectations and emotional distress.

Amy Chan, a dating coach explains that while lowering one's standards is not inherently negative, it becomes problematic when individuals assume that dating someone perceived as less attractive will automatically result in better treatment. She states on the USA Today website, "In this plotline, you're dating an ogre without the princess treatment."

The risks of 'Shrekking'

Engaging in 'Shrekking' can lead to several issues:

• Unrealistic expectations: Assuming that someone will treat you better based solely on their appearance can set you up for disappointment.
• Emotional harm: Lowering your standards may result in entering relationships that are emotionally unfulfilling or even damaging.
• Reinforcement of superficial judgments: The trend may discourage individuals from dating outside their usual type, perpetuating shallow dating practices.

Focusing on character and values

Experts advise that instead of 'Shrekking,' individuals should focus on assessing potential partners based on character, values, and emotional availability, rather than physical appearance. Chan suggests that those who have experienced being 'Shrekked' should use it as an opportunity to clarify their non-negotiables in a partner, regardless of looks.

By prioritizing genuine connections over superficial judgments, individuals can foster healthier and more fulfilling relationships.