Yuck! That’s really dish-gusting

If, while on his annual round of gift-giving in the Yuletide season, Santa Claus were to pop into any school canteen to help himself to a reviving midnight snack, he is unlikely to find on offer any pizzas, burgers, samosas, fries or colas, as all these have been deemed by the Food Safety and Standards Authority of India to be junk foods, high in sugar, salt and fat content, which, come December, are to be banned within 50 m of school campuses.

The move has been prompted by growing concern at the increasing risk of obesity, and related health problems, among young children who are exposed to a diet that aptly might be described as dish-functional.

Even after sensible warnings to the effect that the best place for all manner of so-called junk food is the junkyard, fast food is gaining unmistakable popular ground with alarming rapidity.


The literally enduring attribute of such edibles is testified to by the reported case of an uneaten burger, bought in Australia 25 years ago, which without benefit of refrigeration has remained in pristine condition unmarked by any taint caused by the passage of a quarter of a century.

That anyone eating such an eerily imperishable item might get well and truly burgered underlines the caveat that the best thing to do with fast foods is to go on an indefinite fast where they’re concerned.