Snapchat's new lenses feature is utterly horrifying

Lenses is basically some facial recognition software that’s hacked to distort your expression in various, usually horrifying ways. To activate it, you just open Snapchat, switch to selfie mode and then hold your finger down on your face. A little spiderweb sort of thing will flash over your mug, and seven little icons will appear next to the shutter button. You just swipe to the left to change the lens and that’s when the fun begins.

It seems cute and friendly at first. Then it’s kind of futuristic and Star Treky. It flashes red and says ‘warning’ from time-to-time.

Keep swiping and you’ll get the chance to look like you’re on drugs and rainbows coming out of your mouth. Still sort of fun. Then holy smoke it’s the Babadook or one of the zombies from I Am Legend or something.

The next is supposed to be the monopoly man but it may appear like a peek into your wrinkly future that you never wanted to see.

But at least we almost end on a sweet note. The final lens is basically a pink filter and a shower of hearts and a subtle eye-widening effect that can make you look a little bit like Gollum. Yes, the monsters are winning here.