ICC World Cup 2015: Here's how Team India will roll

Likely minutes of an imaginary board meeting between MS Dhoni and his team before today's World up semifinal:

Name of Organisation: The Indian cricket team, aka the Richie Rich Club which may get richer after Sunday (so boys, don't waste time with hockey).

Date: 26-3-15

Time: 9 am, Sydney

Board Members

Present: MS Dhoni, Ravi Shastri, Duncan Fletcher, Virat Kohli, Rohit Sharma, Shikhar Dhawan, Ajinkya Rahane, Suresh Raina, Ravindra Jadeja, Umesh Yadav, Mohammed Shami, Mohit Sharma and R Ashwin. (Sourav Ganguly tried to enter the room because he still believes he's the captain.)

Absent: Pessimism

Quorum present? Yes.

Proceedings: Meeting called to order at 9.15 am by Chair, Ravi Shastri. The delay was because Rohit Sharma dozed off and Virat was taking selfies.

Chief Executive Dhoni's Report: Dhoni recommended that Umesh Yadav and Mohammed Shami take a cue from Wahab Riaz's excellent spell against Australia, and maybe bowl round the wicket at the rib cages of the Aussies. He also suggested sending Riaz a thank you card for exposing Aussie weaknesses. The CEO next addressed Mohit Sharma. He wanted him to continue bowling his suffocating wicket-to-wicket line and throw in the slower one occasionally. He reminded R Ashwin that though the fast bowlers are in the spotlight, he still had taken a dozen wickets and had an economy rate of 4.29 and would be dangerous against the Aussie left-handers. He then acknowledged the contribution of the batsmen, especially Shikhar Dhawan and Suresh Raina. But Rohit and Rahane had to be more consistent. And lastly, he told Virat Kohli that he was a big occasion player and it was time for him to fi re. On the fi eld.

Assessment of the Meeting: (By Navjot Singh Sidhu on Skype) Meeting sheeting is all very well. But don't make just promises. Promises and eggs are meant to be broken. And remember it's not the load that breaks you, but the way you carry it. Out of a small spark erupts a great fi re. Players wear earphones as soon as Sidhu appears. Meeting adjourned at 9:30 a.m.