Does elite have to mean eggspensive?

Given that it is not some banana-hotel but an the elite Mumbai hostelry, it may not be unfair to assume the eggs it served up at Rs 850 each — according to a bill that went viral on social media last week — must at least be from ostriches or emus not from garden-variety free-range hens. Not merely because a single hen’s egg is far too paltry to be made into a respectable omelette much less a satisfying boiled one, but because it is unlikely that such a hotel would dream of serving up an egg on its own sans full accompaniment of juice, croissants or toast, preserves, sausages or bacon, and coffee or tea. Unfortunately, the mention of colas in the bill belies eggspectations of such complimentary trimmings.

Ostrich or emu eggs, however, would certainly fit the bill. A single off-white ostrich egg is equivalent to 20 hen’s eggs and weighs 1.5 kg, while an emu egg is marginally smaller and its shell is a becoming shade of dark green. More importantly, both are rarer than common eggs and more expensive — about Rs 1,500 apiece in India. In short, apart from sturgeon’s eggs (caviar), turtle eggs (mostly illegal now), Fabergé eggs (inedible, alas) and the proverbial golden goose egg (unavailable, last heard), no other egg can justify high prices. A photograph of these eggsessively eggspensive cackleberries may have eggsplained a lot.