Asking Dr. D: Blame it on Rio

Dear Dr D, Look,
I love the Olympics. To be honest, 'I'm lovin' it©'.

But I am so torn and though I was 'Born Tough©' I cannot escape the charge that I'm avoiding the games merely because 'Yeh Dil Maange More©'.

Fact is, the Olympics doesn't have the same sponsors as the ones who pay me millions. So while I am perfectly willing to 'Think Different©' it's not easy for me to show my support. You know, it's not like I can get into 'The Ultimate Driving Machine©' and just go over.

Yes, the games are in the place I call home, but 'Har Ghar Kuchh Kehta Hai©'.

Don't get me wrong. I know the Olympics is fun. In fact I'd say it's 'The Best A Man Can Get©'. And I have eaten enough 'Desh Ka Namak©' to feel obliged to support my nation and celebrate the universal sporting spirit. Something inside me says 'Just Do It©'.

And yet, in that instant an idea comes to me, so strong ke 'Dimagh Ki Batti Jala De©'. It whispers that the worse that can happen by not going is a blot against my name. But so what? 'Daagh Achche Hain©'.

And if I want to merely celebrate then why not 'Kuch Meetha Ho Jaye©'? You get the idea, Doc? In Jungians terms Doc, I feel very 'Vorsprung Durch Technik©'.

Pelé
Rio De Janerio

Mr Pele
You appear to be so greedy, are you sure your name isn't 'lele'? I would say you have made quite enough of fame and money. It's time to give back. Your country, reeling under reports of muggings and Zika, needs good press.

You should forget your sponsors and go over and cheer your stricken nation. Remember, 'Jiyo Sar Utha Ke'.

STATUTORY WARNING: This humour column is not for the weak-kneed or the thin-skinned.