Are you a 'phubber'? Here's how it can ruin your relationship

If you're constantly checking your phone in her presence, sending text messages, scrolling through your social feeds when she's sitting right there, then you are phubbing. What's worse, you are killing the relationship. Baylor University conducted a survey of over 400 people in relationships. For starters, 46 per cent of people reported that their partners phub them. And that's causing issues in 22 per cent of relationships. So over one-fifth of relationships are under threat because people are too stupid, stubborn or anxious to just put their phones down.

Too distracted

Distractions aren't anything new, and couples have been ignoring each other using TVs for decades. It's much worse with smartphones though, because you can take them everywhere and the message you're sending to your partner when you're checking your phone is that they're completely irrelevant to your happiness. That's one of the worst messages you can send another person.

It's bad enough when it's just a friend, but ditching your real flesh-and-blood woman so you can ogle online is infinitely worse. One, she's supposed to be the person you're closest to in the world. Two, most internet communication is impersonal. At least a text message is somebody trying to contact you directly; you can't say the same about tweets, Instagrams, status updates or Snapchats you're checking.

Limit time on your phone

Here's another piece of advice. If you limit yourself to an hour or two of time on your phone a day, and actually give the woman you're with your undivided attention, you'll have given yourself a leg up in the dating/marriage game. We're not anti-technology or connectivity. Just that there's a time for it, a place for it, and a way to do it properly. Here's a handy starter guide on when it's not okay to phub your partner: 1. You're eating dinner 2. You're watching the same movie together 3. You've just had sex or er… are having sex 4. You're in any public social setting 5. She is paying attention to you in any way

Times when it's okay to phubb

You're just sitting back on the couch, and she's reading a book or watching cable TV without you, and your buddy just sent you the most hilarious forward. If that seems like a pretty restrictive list, there's a message here: put the phone down. You'll feel a lot better if you actually interacted with somebody else in a meaningful way or made your woman feel good than if you got three stars on level 85 of Angry Birds.

If that's not incentive enough, remember this — if you make her feel like the only thing you need for companionship is your smartphone, pretty soon, that's the only thing you might have left.